Perspective

OR: Things That Just Aren't That Big A Deal...

I have a good friend who asked for our New Years Resolutions for her blog. I never got back to her because A). part of me thinks those are useless, and B.) I don't make them. This year however one has been percolating around my consciousness, and sometimes, I'm just more conscious of it than others. Today is one of those days. The thought/resolution is this... I don't have much time before my children aren't little anymore, and I need to enjoy them. Time goes by so fast, and little babies are soon little kids, then little adults, then gone....

Part of that enjoying them stems from this; enjoying exactly who they are, who God sent me, not who I'd like them to be, how I'd like them to act, how I'd like to mold them...

Which means: Relax... Don't sweat the small stuff. Laugh more, teach the more important lessons, quit focusing on the outward, (what others expect my children's behavior to be like). Spend more time focusing on loving every little quirk, and foible.

So here it is... I officially quit. I quit telling my kids the following:

~Not to say butt, because honestly, it's funny to hear a 3 year old say butt, and poop for that matter. Especially when you ask "what do you want to eat?" And the response is "poop!"
~Not to spit (except inside, on the carpet), or gargle their juice/milk, or blow bubbles with straws. (And I hope that when their teachers ask them if they do that at home... you get the idea.)
~Not to roll in the muddy puddles, (I've been blessed with a washer and dryer and an enormous amount of clothes. It's really not that big a deal.)
~Not to throw toys down the stairs.
~Not to jump on the bed, off the couch, off the stairs, etc.
~Not to run in the grocery store. (mainly because I resolve to get a babysitter for grocery store visits from now on.)
~Lastly, I quit feeling the need to apologise for my children's behavior...they are after all children. Mine. But not me. (And with the exception of saying butt, I generally don't do any of the above...)

I will be more diligent about teaching these MORE IMPORTANT LESSONS:
~That I love them for exactly who they came to me as.
~Careful consideration of their siblings.
~Kindness and empathy.
~Be polite.
~How to work hard, how to play hard for that matter.
~To love God.
~To trust themselves, their family, and mostly their parents.

So there it is. Perspective...mine...

P.S. This also means that I'm not cutting my boys hair anymore either. Unless they ask.

Fish Laxatives

This is a true story...

We have a fish that Elleory caught in the pond right by our house and has kept it alive for WAY LONGER than I expected. His name is appropriately...Phish. He's a not gold, goldfish. He has grown to be fairly big, and seems to be thriving on the inattention he receives, and the three plus feedings a day. Our Phish is a little dog-ish...he begs, so everyone who sees him during the day feeds him. Needless to say, he eats well.

Phish has been swimming a little off kilter for the last couple of days, a little sideways... like he has a Nemo fin.

The neighbors across the street just lost their goldfish, Mike, at the beginning of the week, and this is the only reason Phish is still with us I'm sure. (I guess Mike didn't die in vain.) Mike was swimming sideways as well.

So the Mom of Mike says to me:

"Mike passed on."

I say, " Oh no! What happened?" I'm really concerned because Liam's favorite thing to do at that house is pet the fish.

She says "He was swimming sideways... I just didn't take the time to try to save him."

I respond "You can save a fish?!? Phish is swimming sideways."

So she proceeds to explain about swim bladders and fish constipation. How she know this is still a mystery... Anyway, when a fish eats sometimes it gulps too much air, and it's little swim bladder gets to be like a balloon. So you soak their food before you feed them so it sinks and then they swim down to the bottom to eat and that clears out their little air bubbles...a little fish burping I suppose.

The other cause of sideways swimming is constipation, and since fish aren't really forthcoming about what the problem is, we fish mommies have to guess. So the cure is this, and honestly it sounds a bit like this joke my father tells about catching elephants... You skin a pea, yep a garden variety, or in our case a freezer variety pea, and drop it into the tank. Peas don't float so this takes care of the swim bladder thing as well. The fish then gets really excited about a new something to eat and gobbles up/down the pea, and it acts as a laxative. Fish ex-lax.

So I run home, nuke a couple of peas, peel them and throw them into the tank. Phish goes nuts and eats both peas in one swim by.

Waiting... watching...No poop. I was waiting for a miracle here, and expecting immediate results...We did just loose the bunny...can't loose the fish.

Life starts going as life does and Phish starts swimming normally. So I assumed that his little swim bladder was full and he has past his gas in a fish way and it was over. ( the thought runs through my head at this point, if that is where all of the bubbles in the tank come from...)

Sunday the sideways swimming starts again, so knowing exactly what to do, I nuke two peas, peel them, toss them to the fish and move on with Sunday things.

Monday... in between running Elleory to the Physical Therapist, tanning, picking Elleory up, and going to the eye doctor for myself, I stop at the house to get Anders his warm milk. (Yes, I take the time to heat that kid's drink up every time we wants one...don't ask...) As Phish lives on the kitchen counter, right next to the microwave, I see him quite often...So today, out of his tiny, little fish body is hanging the biggest thing I've ever seen come out of Phish.

"Oh holy Moses!" comes out of my mouth. (Well, not ACTUALLY Moses... I've edited the actual word as Brian is somewhat offended by what I actually said.) Phish is pooping his intestine! I'm sure of it. I'm watching him swim very quickly back and forth across the tank. Zipping back and forth, I'm totally sure in complete pain and anguish.

"This can't be good" and "I wonder how you put a fish out of it's misery?" are next out of my mouth.

THEN...the miracle occurs...Phish is done pooping and starts to swim around, normally, and with a big relived smile on his fishy face. "Thanks for the peas, Mom! They really worked!" He says. "Oh by the way, could you feed me now?"

So now you know, If your fish needs to poop, give him a pea. Magic!

Gardening Dilemma

Our garden 2006

A very good year.

It's time to start our garden. The frost is starting to be less frequent and the plants that can handle it are asking to be put out so they can grow. I'm starting to consider the what's and where's. I'm getting antsy for the process.


ON THE OTHER HAND...


We are leaving our garden for the whole month of July. What is the point of all of the sweat and prayers if the neighborhood kid is going to forget to water? Maybe I'm getting lazy or cynical, or (gasp) BOTH...


So here it is the dilemma... to garden or not.


Funny, but I'm not having this internal debate over the flowers.

What Family Home Evening really looks like in the trenches.

So here it is... the real deal. Family Home Evening at our house. I apologize because I'm singing, which I ONLY do at home, for reasons that are apparent. (I'm also laughing which doesn't help matters...) Liam is saying "SHOP!", which is his way of saying stop. It comes out a little bit like shut-up, which is appropriate also. Liam was a bit upset which our choice of music this particular evening. Enjoy the chaos!

We do...

Probably the Reason My Boys Are Still Alive...

TODAY...

A.) They napped... both of them.

B.) They are just so stinkin' cute...asleep.

C.) They have the funniest ideas...

They wanted to "camp" and get out of the "rain". It wasn't raining...yet, when they went down, but that is the new game this week. "Help it's raining..."

I probably ought to include a picture of the swath of destruction, but Anders (really) helped me clean up after he was done with his nap. The miracle couldn't have come at a better time. Liam woke up cranky, and wanted ice cream for dinner. We had ice cream for dinner. It's just been one of those days.


Anders-ism: I asked him this morning if we should have green beer with our lunch because it's leprechaun day.
He said "No..."
I said "Because we don't drink beer?"
He says, "Because we don't drink green."
OK then...

Dr. Seuss by Osmosis

Liam's not a big reader. He really doesn't sit still long enough to enjoy a book. I stick them in his bed to give him something to do before he naps or goes to sleep for the night.

Now I know what he does...
I'm just wondering how long he actually slept on these books before he got uncomfortable and moved. I just took the pictures and left. Somethings you just don't disturb.

An Inspiring Idea

This past week Brian and I went to a very interesting event in Seattle. It was an evening with Matt Flannery, CEO and co-founder of an organization called Kiva. His company is a not-for-profit lending organization focused on micro finance. It was a truly inspirational evening.

Are you aware that for MOST of the world outside of the United States people survive on less than two dollars a day, and that a loan of $25 can change an entire families prospects? $25 dollars is the difference between scraping by, and doing well. It is the means to start a small business that allows children to attend school, allows a mother the dignity of a better living for her children, buys a bus ticket for a woman to go directly to the lake to buy fish from the fishermen, instead of using a middleman, who make a huge profit, while she makes only enough for necessities, but not enough to get ahead.

I sat during his talk and did quick calculations in my head. I spend around 25 dollars a day, just feeding my family. I don't "own" my own home, so there is a daily living expense to add, I put gas in my car to run my kids to preschool, music lessons, McDonald's... things I feel very blessed to be able to have and do. But there is NO WAY my family could live on less than $2 a day. Not even less than $10 a day. We are considerably lucky, and it's time to let others know.

Please go to www.kiva.org and look around at the people who have gone to a lender in their area, and who qualify for a micro loan. People who could benefit from our wealth. 98% of this money gets paid back with in a year. Really. It is for us, the people lending, a donation we would get back. You can choose to with drawl your money when you get repaid, or redistribute the funds to someone else who could benefit. There is no interest earned. This is a non-profit group. All of the people who qualify for a loan are screened and hoping to start legitimate businesses, people who just need a little help to make their lives better.

I'm making an effort to "find" some money. Please join me. Make someones life easier.

The Picture Every Mother Needs...

for senior year book dedication pages, wedding receptions, etc...

P.S. This was a total false alarm...delay tactic, pajama time, death bed repentance "go pee pee on the potty". All Liam's idea. No actual peeing involved.

Can I just tell you how much...

I love blog 'time out'??

I can hear my kids, down stairs with Brian, getting ready for bed, having the last snack of the day, and here I sit...reading and catching up with my sisters and dear friends...in blog 'time out'. AND, I wasn't even naughty...

Beautiful Day...

I don't have any pictures to post. I'm sure you're SO amazed by that revelation... Kate doesn't take pictures?!? Not often... mostly I just don't remember to.

We had a beautiful lunch time at the park today, at the request of Anders. We had nothing else to do so we stopped on the way home from speech. It was marvelous. Warm, and sunny. The boys played for well over a hour, with each other. I couldn't tell if it was the sunshine glinting off their blond heads or if they had little halos today. I've never actually seen them be so sweet to each other. They played the funniest game. "QUICK! The dinosaurs are coming..." Where they would slide down the slide and then yell "Quick! The dinosaurs are coming" then run around the park screaming, climb up the slide and start all over again. Magic.

My favorite line of the day was Anders to Liam
"Liam, trust me..." (HHHMMM, Suspect...) He is actually quoting Aladdin. Still...

I LOVE SPRING TIME!