Me and Math...

I'll be totally honest, I hate math.  I'm handicapped.  Not stupid... just slow when it comes to numbers. I'd like to think I'm just more creative than the rest of the world.

One of the things I love to do is keep track of the miles I run.  I write the mileage of each run onto the box that my current running shoes come in.  The list starts out with the date I purchased the shoes on then proceeds to march down the box, in a nice tidy row. I also write where I ran and sometimes with whom and my time if I like it.  At the end of the month, I tally up the miles and, Voila!  My favorite number of the day!  It brings me SUCH satisfaction. 

This month it was time for a new pair of shoes mid way through.  I retired the old pair, which means totaling out the entire list of numbers (I use a calculator for this) and breaking the numbers into three different categories.  Total for each month, and total over all mileage, number of days run and days rested.  For the most part I need a fairly accurate number so I know when to buy new shoes. 

This last month has been phenomenal! (If I do say so myself!) Record breaking, or so I thought.  I added up all my numbers, making sure to add in tomorrow's miles because, unless I die over night, I'm running 8 in the morning and that brings my total miles run for October to 150 miles!  I'm thrilled!  That's 21 days of running, 10 rest days.  I decide to compare that with last months figures.  I pull out that box from the closet and SHOCK OF ALL SHOCKS!  I ran 5 miles more last month in one less day.  My inner Miss Clavel speaks "Something is not right!"

I get the calculator out and run those numbers again...

All I can say is this, I have a handicap.  I have NO IDEA how I got that number, and I still have about 40 miles I can run in my last pair of shoes, regardless of how they make my feet ache. 

Looking on the bright side, it's a little like getting a late birthday present...

My Alternate Reality...

I am not a silly woman, nor am I a dumb blond. However, I've noticed that I have started doing really stupid things.  The following story is just an example...

I use my phone for just about everything, calendar, alarm clock, music, movies etc... Every night I set the alarm labeled (I'm in now way kidding) "GET UP AND RUN".  Usually it's set for somewhere between 4 AM and 6 AM.  Some mornings I hop right out of bed and get going. Other mornings I hit snooze.  This morning was not a hop up morning, and not a snooze morning it was a...something in between morning.  Here's how the scenario plays out...

Beep beep beep... fumble, fumble, fumble...finally off. I tapped the off button probably six times, and finally that obnoxious noise stops.

Mr. Bergholm says, more to his pillow than to me,"You are not going running.  It's pouring down rain."

I say "  I don't hear rain, you're just hearing the fan."

He says " Nope, I can hear it falling on the roof."

I say "It can't be raining, my phone said it would be clear." 

Mr Bergholm "It's raining..."

At this point I sit up and hit the Weather Channel app and shove it into his face (bright light and all) and say " See!?!  Clear!  It's not raining... the little moon doesn't have clouds on it!"

He says " Honey... get up...out of bed and look outside." 

I huff, throw the covers off and leave my warm bed.  I'm muttering to myself the whole way down the stairs 'I'm going to prove you wrong buddy and your gonna have 10 minute to find your running gear and your coming outside, in the clear night, to run with me, just because my phone is right, and so am I!'

I open the front door to rain...pouring rain.  Not just a drizzle, POURING RAIN.  Mr. Bergholm was right, not my super phone.  I was stunned, amazed...flabbergasted. I opened the Weather Channel app and there it was...a bright moon with no clouds covering it, with a big 44 degrees right under it.  I go to the next page, where it shows the hourly weather.  There it is again, a big beautiful moon...no clouds.  I look up and out the door and there is STILL rain pouring out of the sky. 

I re-set my alarm, walk up my stairs, crawl back into bed and say nothing. Mr. Bergholm has the covers over his head.  No comment from him.  Oh, he was not asleep...he was not giggling...he was probably wondering where his smart wife went and who was this dumb chick in bed with him!

Maybe I ought to leave the weather forecasting to the old American Indian method..."If the rock is wet...it's raining."

P.S.  When I woke up one hour later and walked out of the house to go to the gym to see my Personal Trainer, there was not a cloud in the sky...stars everywhere, and it was colder than 44 degrees.

Grocery List

Thursday, I went for a quick trip to the grocery store with child number three. Just us two...ALMOST grocery store bliss.  Here is a copy of my list:

Fruit
Veg
Chocolate Milk
Snickers Bar (use free coupon)
GU (buy case)

That was the whole list.  2 different stores.  You can't buy a case of Chocolate Outrage GU at the regular grocery store. That you get at REI.

I just pulled the list out of the car with my trash and had to laugh.  If I had, perchance, picked up a cart with that list still stuck to it, I would automatically assume that that person was a runner.  Those are all the things you need before, during, and after a long run.  Heaven knows that you certainly carb load with good carbs the whole week before the big run. Drink chocolate milk right after as a recovery drink. Squeeze in a GU every 40 minutes during, and inhale a big ole' Snickers bar as a reward for pushing yourself that hard. It's all perfectly thought out and a formula that works great for me. 

I'm glad I didn't leave it on the cart. Because if a stranger doesn't know that formula, it just doesn't look that great.  One's shopping list says a lot about one to others.